Jumping Out of Swings (1990)
One summer night, Terri, Adam and I walked to the subdivision playground. There was a swingset and I decided to show Adam how to swing real high, then "bail out". I landed off balance and fell, breaking my wrist.
I do not handle pain well, so I was alternating between blackouts and "ralphing". We began the 6 block walk back to the house.
I filled a cuptowel with ice while Terri arranged for the neighbors to watch the boys. We got into the car and headed for the local hospital. I leaned out the window in anticipation of an "Technicolor yawns".
Terri pulled up to the Emergency Entrance at the hospital to let me out. I realized the ice packed on my wrist had melted onto my shorts making it look like I had "wizzed" myself. Once inside, they put me on a stretcher and pushed me into the corner while they handled an officer shot in the line of duty.
Finally, x-rayed and cast, I headed home. This was my first broken limb and the staff made no mention of keeping the wrist elevated. I went home and to bed, only to awaken at 1am to intense throbbing with an arm swollen like a watermelon. The pain became so bad that I drove myself back to Emergency where they slit the cast to relieve the pain. I returned the next day for a new cast. After that I went everywhere with my arm elevated.
A week later our neighbor, Chris, knocked on the door. Chris quietly came in and asked if I would drive him to the hospital - he had shot himself in the hand with a nail gun! He knew I was familiar with the ropes at the hospital.
We drove down to the hospital and returned some 4 hours later with his hand in bandages with instructions to keep it elevated. For a week we looked like matching bookends with our arms elevated.
-Wayland